Christ, it’s one of those days in the office where half the staff are absent and those that are in, including me, are thoroughly fucked off they too didn’t opt out.

Being off work when many are off isn’t too bad; it’s like being lost in the crowd in a mire of absenteeism. Obviously from my point of view (I’m one of the directors in this place, for what it’s worth, which isn’t much save the bonus) it’s particularly annoying when one is in and ones fellow director and CEO are absent, as in the case today. In addition to my annoyance of actually being here when I could’ve had a scott free day off without losing a single brownie point, I’m also in charge, which turns me instantly into a belligerent cunt…

We have a new member of staff. It turns out this fellow used to be the Headmaster of a very well and known and respected Private school in London, but he also used to be an alcoholic which may explain why he’s here.

He’s a short and round type of a chap with a grey comb-over, he has a kind face and sharp eyes, his glasses sit on the end of his nose. He’s built for scholarly gowns. He must have worked hard as a young man to get to where he was, enjoyed the benefits of being made headmaster of a reputed institution, reaping the rewards of being a distinguished academic whose achievements were reflected in the sheer excellence of his charges, not to mention the extortionate fees…

Then he finds himself being instructed how to turn on a fucking computer by yours truly, in a bad mood and certainly not minding his language, secretly relishing the minutiae flinches he makes when a profanity is uttered.

It doesn’t matter what he was before he came here, we’ve a handful of characters in this place that have had led illustrious lives, some known to the wider public, but it concerns me not. For whilst they are here they are not what they were, they are no more than another worker in an office, like me. But not like me. For today, I’m in charge.