Cormack McCarthy has completely revolutionised my travelling on the tube. A few years ago tube travel was beyond me, my claustrophobia and tendency to throw random screaming panic attacks prevented me from even contemplating putting myself in such an environment. Due to sheer necessity and some helpful guidance from Frank I slowly learned to deal with it, even overcoming being stuck in a tunnel for 5 desperate minutes where I was convinced I was going to completely lose control of my faculties, this included having to prevent myself from fucking the bloke next to me just to take my mind off my own mortality. And I don’t even do cock.
These days I bound down the escalator and stand mustard-keen on the platform and wait, book in hand, for my carriage to rattle out of the smoky dark and arrive at the very spot -first car, last seat on the left- that allows me to walk on in one step and seat myself in a second. In a flash the book is on and I’m right there, no longer on the tube but way yonder watching a foreign sky, alien plains waiting for death in every shadow. I know I have a solid chunk of 25 minutes to remain in this state, I don’t notice the stations, the travellers, noise or smell, I’m locked far away. Twice in the last month I’ve missed my stop due to being completely absorbed.
Once I had alighted from the tube at Leicester Square, the book drifting out of my being as I ascended into the warm sunshine, I met up with Frank in the pub off Seven Dials and began drinking in earnest, Harry joined us, then Den, who’d managed to get to the bar without noticing us and was waiting outside for us to show up, and finally Liam. The conversation in hand revolved largely about the thing that I’m unable to discuss on here for the present, without wishing to go into detail I’m fortunate to have such sympathetic friends and I drank with a refreshed combination of inspiration and raw fear.
Harry who’d just returned from Berlin needed to grab a cab back to South London as he’d a pile of luggage, I joined him for the ride. By now I was a little fucked and can’t remember too much, I was home and in bed before 1am, of that I’m sure, having failed to eat.
The weekend is shaping up well; swathes have been delegated for social exchange and areas left blank in order to write. My movements tonight are uncertain, I may even stick at home for once, who knows.
After the edited Friday list a tune from Jane’s Addiction. I leave you with my best wishes and a genuine desire for you to have splendid weekends.
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