Comments on: if I had a hammer http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/ Sat, 11 Feb 2012 17:56:00 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.com/ By: piqued http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2325 Thu, 15 May 2008 09:35:54 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2325 I can beleive it…

‘In the beginnning there was nothing? Until I, Geri, wore a tiny union jack dress?’

geri x:ivv

]]> By: shleppy http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2319 Wed, 14 May 2008 18:33:58 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2319 I heard on the radio this morning that Gerri decided to re-write the bible.. yes, can you believe that shit? I heard it on Q107.

]]> By: Napoleon http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2318 Wed, 14 May 2008 16:46:11 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2318 Oh, I see. So how do explain the jizz stains?

]]> By: Swineshead http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2317 Wed, 14 May 2008 16:43:39 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2317 He used to have a time share scheme with fellow fenster, Craig Wright. They’d leave grot mags in those bushes for one another so they could up their consumption at half the price. In fact, I believe Craig got his for free as his father was a sexual deviant.

The reason they were all battered was because they were left out for night on end and got all rain on them.

]]> By: Napoleon http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2316 Wed, 14 May 2008 16:29:07 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2316 HA HA! GREAT post! I’m sure it was worth writing, whatever it was. Meanwhile, Piqued’s three readers might want to take a break from his miserable whining, and rock their cocks to my NEWLY UPDATED XXX FUMPO-PORNO up-the-Nigella MILF DIRT SITE – NIGELLA IN BEANS. Would you rather be shoving beans up a hot sauce-lubricated haricot shute than reading this paedophile’s site? I would! Which is why I urge you to follow me to the promised land that is NIGELLA IN BEANS! GO THERE NOW!

http://nigellainbeans.blogspot.com/

]]> By: John Q Wagonwheel http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2314 Wed, 14 May 2008 15:55:58 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2314 Bugger, they’ve all gone. I had an exam, y’buggers.

]]> By: John Q Wagonwheel http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2313 Wed, 14 May 2008 15:46:20 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2313 IT’S ME.

]]> By: piqued http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2312 Wed, 14 May 2008 15:09:39 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2312 It was anger Napoleon, naked women enrage him, he thinks they’re dirty

]]> By: Napoleon http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2310 Wed, 14 May 2008 14:58:53 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2310 JonR- To the hedge with it! Imagine the joy you’ll bring to a dirty-minded thirteen year old.

Swineshead – Was it? Why did he feel the need to rip the stuff up?

]]> By: Swineshead http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2309 Wed, 14 May 2008 14:45:24 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2309 It was actually my older brother

*true fact*

]]> By: JonR http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2308 Wed, 14 May 2008 14:40:36 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2308 for reasons i can’t be arsed to go into, i am currently in possession of a particularly joyless slice of jazz cinema bought in the “bargain bin” of an Amsterdam sex shop, we’ve recently moved house and my wife asked me to get rid, instead i’m just carrying the DVD around in my bag, taking it to work every day like a big fate-tempting moron.

i just don’t know what to do with it. i had considered stuffing it in a hedge to get some sort of cosmic porn karma, but i’m open to other suggestions. what would you do with a video featuring German drug addicts, “swordfighting” etc? i tried watching it, it just made me sad.

]]> By: piqued http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2307 Wed, 14 May 2008 14:34:56 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2307 Yes, oddly these woods were by a railway track, what is it with railway workers and Swineshead’s dad

]]> By: Napoleon http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2306 Wed, 14 May 2008 14:12:57 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2306 There was special spot under a tree out in the fens where kindly gentlemen deposited ripped-up mucky books for us young folk to find. It was on the way to Swineshead’s house.

The railway lines also delivered forth a glorious bounty of used grumble, if you knew where to look. Glory days.

]]> By: piqued http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2305 Wed, 14 May 2008 14:09:19 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2305 …who then kindly dumps it in the woods by a tree near a stream for a 12 year old Piqued and his mate to find. That was a good day, I think I had my first tab too

]]> By: Napoleon http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2304 Wed, 14 May 2008 14:08:34 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2304 I realise the above statement doesn’t apply now you can overdose on 24 hour spangle thanks to the internet.

]]> By: Napoleon http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2303 Wed, 14 May 2008 13:53:00 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2303 She had one of those too. I loved that woman. Sadly, as is always the way with pornography, the magazine was ‘borrowed’, and I never saw it again. I always say you don’t own porn, you simply keep hold of it for the person who’s going to steal it from you.

]]> By: piqued http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2302 Wed, 14 May 2008 13:45:29 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2302 With a riding cropped?

]]> By: Napoleon http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2301 Wed, 14 May 2008 13:24:24 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2301 Cropped up in Club International, that is.

]]> By: Napoleon http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2300 Wed, 14 May 2008 13:23:57 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2300 I’m still in love with a woman called ‘Charlotte’ who cropped up in riding gear in 1994. God, I WANTED that woman. I still do. I do, I do.

]]> By: Napoleon http://piqued.co.uk/2008/05/14/if-i-had-a-hammer/#comment-2299 Wed, 14 May 2008 13:10:59 +0000 http://piqued.wordpress.com/?p=354#comment-2299 I wouldn’t have any other softcore publication in the house (unless I found half a Razzle under a hedge). Sadly, they let it go down-market in about 2001. It’s not the same any more, alas.

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