Before I forget, there will be no Piqued tomorrow. I have to attend a course for work and won’t have access to a PC. For some reason they nominated the office misanthrope to go on a first aid course on the basis, one should imagine, that I’ve had ‘medical experience’. Wiping old ladies arseholes and pushing spoonfuls of mashed up food into their gawping maws is quite a long way from Holby City I weakly protested as I was coerced into signing up. I suppose it’s a day out of the office if nothing else. Complete waste of time mind you, all that resuss stuff is so unhygienic, ugh, the thought of having to put my mouth near a common person or a foreigner is enough to make ones stomach eject ones kedgeree, to be honest I’m perfectly happy to watch someone cark it smoking a nice tab then massage my subsequent woody until all spunk comes out.
I had a clement evening after my session of enforced labour. I was extraordinarily tired which didn’t help the work dynamic but I muddled on through. I arrived home, changed then went off to meet Frank in the local. We had a couple of pints of ale and discussed matters of no concern here, these were cheerier topics than that implies incidentally, and I was home before 8pm. I resurrected the chicken and mushroom pie from the freezer and shoved it in the oven while I attempted to make progress on Scarface instead of just picking fights with passing strangers and shooting them in the head. It was useless so I gave up and watched the The Three Burials Of Melquiades Estrad which I’d not seen before, why hadn’t I seen it before? It’s brilliant. If you haven’t you must.
Out again tonight but like yesterday I’m taking it easy and putting in an early night. I don’t fancy being to taught the first aids with a hangover, less so, taking a post rush hour tube up to town feeling like my brain and stomach have traded places.
I’ll be back here on Thursday to report what I learned tomorrow, don’t know about you but that thrills me to death.
This band make a long overdue debut on Piqued…
May 20th, 2008 at 1:02 pm
Popular in here today…
May 20th, 2008 at 1:05 pm
More popular than yours….
May 20th, 2008 at 1:06 pm
Have you tried kissing that rubber first-aid mannequin? You’ll have to if you’re doing lifesaving. It’s all full of other people’s elderly spit, and the rubber smells vile. It’s an odd colour, too.
May 20th, 2008 at 1:07 pm
Yeah but I’ve got a bigger cock so I win.
May 20th, 2008 at 1:08 pm
I assume ‘Bumavenger’ is referring to the Annies.
May 20th, 2008 at 1:51 pm
John Q, please, a lady may happen to come across this blog. She will not want to know that your cock is bigger!
May 20th, 2008 at 1:56 pm
I doubt it is HD
Bumavenger, I’ve not tried kissing such a thing but you’ve just described what it’s like kissing my old mum
May 20th, 2008 at 2:02 pm
Good point, HD. Let me know if you see one coming.
May 20th, 2008 at 2:34 pm
It’s a huge mistake to learn life-saving as then, when a syphilitic tramp suddenly collapses in front of you, mouth filled with kebab-vomit, you HAVE to give him the kiss of life.
May 20th, 2008 at 3:03 pm
It was nice and quiet in here till JQW came in with his second rate sub-Ben Perry gags.
May 20th, 2008 at 3:18 pm
Bumavener, I’m doing first aid, I’m not swearing the hypocratic oath. If a tramp chooses to act in such a manner I’ll merely watch him whilst enjoying my engorged member pushing my jeans into a pyramid
May 22nd, 2008 at 4:41 pm
Sub-Ben Perry? I’m a genre now?
May 23rd, 2008 at 8:46 am
I think it was SH suggesting that JQW was being rude for the sake of it when he’s not qualified to do so. You’re a known quantity, you shit, he’s not
May 24th, 2008 at 6:04 pm
Piss off, I’ll not withold myself and be bland. There’s no hierarchy on blogging. EAT ME.
May 27th, 2008 at 11:42 am
*waves cock*
May 27th, 2008 at 12:48 pm
Dorty fecker.