Short ‘un today, I’m already up against it.
Yesterday was dreadful too, it consisted of a dull vacuum bereft of any activity whatsoever before suddenly convulsing into a work nightmare of such epic proportions it should’ve starred Vincent Price and perhaps featured a very young David Oglivy.
On top of all of this the casual mention on yesterdays Pi that I was a month away from being 40 gained its own momentum. When it all kicked off in the office, to use the futballs vernacular, the ‘YOU’RE GOING TO BE 40 WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING’ polemic unfurled itself in my brain like a soiled flag and frantically waved in my minds eye intensifying the ridiculousness of my predicament.
I spurned my evening plans. I needed to be alone to turn all this over. I helped myself to a broccoli and bacon pie after I’d prepared it/cooked it and settled down in front of BBC4 to enjoy ‘The Art of Italy’ with a bottle of wine. This came at a price, the programme was quite excellent but the pleasure was offset by the fact that the programme virtually followed a mini grand tour I’d undertaken in my 20’s with James. In fact, the presenter virtually copied my own journey highlighting little gems that I’d taken as my own. ‘That should be you doing this show’ I concluded despite the fat chance it should be and poured another glass.
…and for fuck sake someone rescue Woolworths.
Henry had this at his funeral, he’ll always be 27. Not sure how I feel about that.
November 27th, 2008 at 12:14 pm
I’m not looking forward to being 40 either. Luckily that’s 17 years away.
November 27th, 2008 at 1:01 pm
…god willing TS
November 27th, 2008 at 1:21 pm
I am a full year away from being 40. In a backwards direction. When/ if you do away with c*nt, if you chopped him into little bits you could hide them in the pick ‘n’ mix at Woolies. When discovered, this would create the perfect media storm with which to celebrate your 40th. I for one would perpetuate your fame by selling dodgy stories about you to the press… Move over Foxy Knoxy, here comes Mr P
November 27th, 2008 at 1:37 pm
It’s a very good argument, some would say ‘strong’ including me writing this.
Chances are, though, his bits wouldn’t be found in the Pix n Mix on account of no more Woolies. This means I’d have to leave his bits strewn about his flat.
Oh well, easy come easy go.
November 27th, 2008 at 3:28 pm
I’m just the wrong side of 40 too – once you come to terms with it it’s bloody great! I am NOBODY – I’ve fallen off just about every demographic there is, I’m not pressured to buy anything or be anyone I can just invisibly go about my business! I love it! Until I realise that the next milestone is… 50…
Shit.
November 27th, 2008 at 3:43 pm
I don’t see Woolworth’s asking for bailouts from the US government. They’re just gits.
November 28th, 2008 at 10:17 am
i dreamt i met you last night piqued, i thought you looked really young actually (although you were played by a guy out of Mudvayne)
November 28th, 2008 at 11:16 am
Jon, I do actually look really young. For a start of have the genitals of a 5 year old.
November 28th, 2008 at 11:29 am
I don’t think he meant the ones in a jar in the basement.
November 28th, 2008 at 3:46 pm
> I have the genitals of a 5 year old.
that’s nicely symmetrical with that Blue Jam sketch with the little girl whose parents have her “fitted with the cock and balls of a 40 year old man”.